IT families: Nursultan Amir and Dana Abdirahim

Nursultan Amir, City — Seattle, software engineer, @nursul.amir

Dana Abdirakhym, City — Seattle, data analyst, @dana.abdirakhym

About Us

Dana. We met in Astana when Nursultan flew in from Seattle to renew his visa. From the very first day we met, we became friends and started communicating. Nursultan gave me advice on applying to universities in the US and helped with my resume. Soon after, we started dating. Since then, our relationship has only grown stronger, and today we are a happy married couple.

Nursultan. We had been following each other on social media for a couple of years, but we couldn't meet because I lived in the US and Dana in Europe. We first met in 2022 in Astana. From the first day, we were on the same wavelength, and I immediately realized that Dana was the girl of my dreams. Soon after, we started dating and considered master's programs in the US for Dana. In the end, she received offers from several universities, one of which was the University of Washington, my alma mater. A year later, we got married, and Dana moved to the US.

How we entered the IT field

Dana. Previously, I worked as a financial specialist in various companies, including Citibank, Exxon, and IBM in Hungary. At some point, I realized that this was not for me. On my husband's advice, I tried my hand at analytics and data science. I prepared diligently for a whole year and was admitted on a grant to the "Business Analytics" program at the University of Washington. This field captivated me because I was able to use data and machine learning to predict and model various interesting scenarios, for example, predicting student dropout rates in the US. I recently graduated with a master's degree and received an offer from Amazon for an ML data position in the artificial intelligence team. The process of getting a job at Amazon was stressful due to high competition in the job market.

Nursultan. I first learned about programming when I entered the bachelor's program at MUITS. This direction immediately became special to me because I always loved creating something new, and programming provided the opportunity to create programs using a computer.

During my university studies, I had a dream to one day work at Google or Facebook. I dedicated several years to improving my programming skills and applying to these companies.

Over time, my efforts paid off. I got into many leading technology companies, including Google and Facebook. Ultimately, I joined Facebook.

Division of responsibilities

Dana. I am responsible for order, cooking, and cleaning, while my husband handles finances, investments, and buying necessary things for the house, as well as planning our vacations. After work, we relax, do meditation, and exercise at the gym. In my free time, I enjoy spiritual practices and reading books, carefully monitoring where I direct my energy.

Nursultan. I love watching documentaries about space and the universe. In the summer, we try to go hiking if the weather in Seattle allows, and in the winter, we go skiing.
Also, we travel to different cities in the US several times a year.

Family traditions

Dana.
We travel often, sometimes every month, and celebrate all important dates. My husband buys me flowers on weekends, and I treat him to homemade food or gluten-free desserts. We not only monitor our diet but also our thoughts and words. For us, health—both mental and physical—is a priority. Our family tradition is to try coffee in cafes we haven't been to on weekends. 

Nursultan. We celebrate birthdays or achievements at restaurants. We try to call our parents every week. We have lunch at my office with Dana every Friday. In the evenings, we drink chamomile tea and love to talk.

Our family values and priorities:

— health 

— my wife 

— family and parents

— work

— hobbies 

— rest.

Combining household chores and work

Dana.
Although I haven't started working yet, during my studies it wasn't difficult for me to combine classes and household chores. I think that with my husband's support, I will be able to successfully combine work and household responsibilities in the future.

Nursultan. Combining IT work with managing the household and family can be challenging, but with proper planning and organization, it is quite possible. IT work often requires high concentration and can take up a lot of time, especially if there are urgent tasks or projects with tight deadlines.

However, modern technologies and flexible work schedules allow for finding a balance between professional activities and personal life. For example, the possibility of remote work or a flexible schedule helps manage time better and pay attention to family and household matters.

Recommendations for a happy family life

Dana. 1. Support. We always support each other in all endeavors.

2. Motivation. We love to motivate each other and learn new things.

3. Communication. We discuss everything and try to be open with each other. Also, we call our parents in Kazakhstan every week.

4. Learning new things. Every year we try to learn something new. For example, my husband taught me to ski, and I help him master prioritization skills to balance work and family life.

Nursultan. We never criticize or blame each other. If something is not right, we talk calmly and try to listen to each other. It is important to maintain respect and understanding in the relationship.

How IT families differ from others

Nursultan and Dana. The peculiarity of such families is that we often discuss new technologies and their impact on our lives. Our family is distinguished by the fact that we always strive to learn new things and support each other in both professional and personal development. We are open to new knowledge and try to apply it in our lives.