IT families: Bakai Orozaliyev and Salima Aitmambetova

Bakai Orozaliev, city — Bishkek, senior iOS developer at EPAM, Linkedin

Salima Aitmambetova, city — Bishkek, senior UX/UI Designer, founder of UX Community, @salima.aitmambetova

About Us

Salima. I work on freelance projects. I have my own course, I am also developing the UX Community of designers in Kyrgyzstan, and I am raising a wonderful son. My husband and I have known each other for 15 years; we practiced Chinese martial art Wushu together, but in different clubs. We met at training sessions and competitions, and often hung out with friends. We had many common interests. I believed in the friendship between a girl and a guy, and sincerely wanted to see the woman he would eventually marry. The universe accepted my request and handed me a mirror.

Bakai. I met Salima at training sessions, back in our youth. We were junior instructors and often participated in organizing competitions. Over time, our strong friendship grew into a serious relationship, and after three years, I proposed.

How we entered the IT field

Bakai. I studied at the American University in Central Asia in the Software Engineering department. My career path began with a small internship at Zensoft. Currently, I am a senior iOS developer at EPAM. I work remotely on an international project.

Salima. I have been in the IT field for over six years. I started my path in a bank as a training specialist, where my main tasks were related to design. UX/UI design is a relatively young profession. I began studying it when there were not many specialists in the market. The profession was difficult to master; I taught myself everything because there were no courses yet. In the end, through small steps, I reached where I am today. My husband and I work from home; he works during the day, and I, mostly, at night.

Distribution of responsibilities

Salima. Our responsibilities are divided based on each person's availability: if one of us needs rest, the other can take on household chores. Mostly, we keep things tidy every day and do a major cleaning on Saturdays. Every weekend, I plan the menu for the week, and then we go grocery shopping together. This way, we don't have to think every evening about what to cook for dinner.

Bakai. In the evenings, during our free time, we love taking a walk in the park with coffee or a smoothie. After putting our child to sleep, we enjoy watching movies or travel vlogs over a cup of tea with treats. On weekends, we try to go out into nature or take long trips. This helps us distract ourselves from the city hustle and enjoy family time.

Family traditions

Salima. We have small family traditions that appeared after we got married. Our parents live nearby: mine in the adjacent district, and Bakai's in the neighboring house. Once a week, we have a mandatory joint dinner—we invite relatives to our place or visit them. This helps us not to forget family values; we even gave this day a name—"Celebration Thursday."

Combining household chores and work

Salima. We both used to work in the office, come home, and focus only on household chores, cooking, walking, and having a delicious dinner while watching a movie. We had a clear boundary between work and home. It was easy before the baby was born. However, after our child's birth, our daily routine changed regarding work schedules and household tasks: we do what we can as we go.

Since we both work remotely, we do not notice difficulties in managing household affairs. Bakai has always liked the work-from-home format; he knows how to clearly separate personal life and work, even if my husband and I approach him for hugs during work hours, 1000 times a day.

Recommendations for a happy family life

Salima. We follow the expression: "Every man is the smith of his own happiness." Everyone has their own life, principles, and goals. If we want to be happy, we understand that our life is only in our hands. We have only one life, and we try to be mindful—simply live this life without any unnecessary difficulties. Problems occur in any family couple, but you are not alone—you have each other, and you can overcome them together; it might even be fun.

Always helps the ability to speak and listen to each other in difficult moments. People are based on feelings; it is important for us to express them in time and not bury them deep, whether it is resentment or joy. In four years of marriage, we have learned this, understood how to be a support for each other, confess our love every day, and delight each other. And also, happiness loves silence.

How IT families differ from others

Bakai. Our family is different in that we both work, and at the same time, we raise and educate our son ourselves, without leaving him with nannies or in kindergarten. We have the opportunity to be close to him, to see how he grows and develops. Also, we can handle family matters during the day or spend a weekday morning in the mountains as a whole family.

Salima. First of all, it is interesting, and we understand each other. I am a UX/UI designer, and my husband is an application developer; we could start a startup together. If I worked in another field, I would not have such freedom, and I would not understand my husband well. But now I can sometimes throw in an idea for solving a problem, or he can adjust my design based on development capabilities.

Secondly, it is the opportunity to work from any point in the world, distributing your time as you find convenient.

Thirdly, the IT field is considered high-paying, which allows creating your own comfort.