IT families: Bakhtiyar Shegenbaev and Aizhan Dauletkalieva

An IT family from Astana shared how they met on a work project, how they divide responsibilities at home, and how their shared professional field helps them better understand each other.

Bakhtiyar Shegenbayev, city — Astana, Head of Information Security at QazCode, LinkedIn, Instagram

Aizhan Dauletkalieva, city — Astana, project manager, LinkedIn, Instagram

About Us

Bakhtiyar. I am the Head of Information Security at QazCode. I entered the IT field at a young age — I have been interested in computers and technology since childhood. When I got my first computer, I started figuring out how everything works, and over time, this hobby became my profession.

Aizhan and I met on a work project: I represented the client side, while she was the project manager on the contractor's side.

Aizhan. I have been working as a project manager for nearly seven years. Our acquaintance began with work — we participated together in a project to implement an IT system. At first, we communicated only about work matters, but over time, this communication turned into friendship, and then into a relationship.

How We Entered the IT Field

Aizhan. I entered IT relatively recently — after the pandemic. Before that, I worked in a different field, but I decided to try myself in a new direction. I chose project management because I already had experience in managing processes and teams. Currently, I work remotely with distributed teams.

Bakhtiyar. I have a hybrid work format — part of the time I work in the office, and part remotely. My main specialization is information security.

Division of Responsibilities

Aizhan. We do not have a strict division of responsibilities. Everything depends on workload: if one of us has a lot of work, the other takes on more household chores. We try to support each other and remain equal partners.

Bakhtiyar. We try to spend our free time together — we go for walks, watch series, and sometimes play board games.

Family Traditions

Bakhtiyar. We have a simple rule: if one person cooks, the other washes the dishes. Also, we often watch football together — this can also be considered our small tradition.

Aizhan. Another important tradition for us is not going to sleep if we have had a fight. We try to discuss the problem immediately and talk through our emotions so that we do not hold grudges.

We also try to spend more time together on weekends, because during the week work takes up most of the time.

Combining Household and Work

Aizhan. In general, combining work and household chores is not difficult for us. The job of a project manager involves organizing processes, so these skills also help in everyday life.

Bakhtiyar. The main thing is to try to maintain a balance between work and personal life.

Recommendations for a Happy Family Life

Bakhtiyar. It is important to listen to each other, respect your partner's opinion, and try to understand their point of view.

Aizhan. Empathy and openness are also important. You should not be afraid to talk about your feelings and show your weak sides. Honesty and trust help build strong relationships.

How IT Families Differ from Others

Bakhtiyar. When both partners work in IT, there is a special mutual understanding. We face similar professional challenges — for example, stress or imposter syndrome.

Aizhan. Because we work in the same field, it is easier for us to understand the context of each other's work problems. Sometimes we can even suggest a solution or support each other in a difficult situation.

We are "in the same boat": we develop in the same industry and support each other both in life and at work.